Find more Day Nine songs at Myspace Music
That's the chorus to the song "Hiding" from my old band Day Nine (http://myspace.com/day9). I wrote it after a death in the family, and I was having to come to grips with that death.
I feel that right now very strongly considering all that I'm still dealing with after this separation between Sarah and I.
I left the laundromat, it was growing dark and had almost reached total night, but the sky still clung to some dark blue hints of light. The window in the car was down, and I could feel the springtime humidity of Ohio on my skin. Linger from The Cranberries came on the radio. This deadly combination sent a wave of memories roaring back. Spring time in Ohio is one of my favorites, but not only is this my first spring in 3 years (Colorado technically has spring, but at 9,000 feet you can't really compare it to Ohio), it's also my first spring being single in 12 years. I had an urge to sit outside and just enjoy the weather, and I was happy about that until I realized that I would be doing that alone.....which sent me into a downward spiral.
I'm ok now, but this is just further evidence of how I'm still trying to come to terms with things. I feel that this blog can be a public record of my struggle, and if it helps someone else going through the same thing to realize that they aren't alone in these feelings, then I'm happy. But my goal here isn't to help people, it's to heal myself.
So here I sit wishing yet again that I didn't have to spend every evening all alone. But this space doesn't have to be occupied by a lover, it could be a friend. I just have no one to be with in this town. When all of your friends are 50 miles away, who can you talk to?
Other than facebook, I only have this blog.
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