Update

I've been thinking. Things have turned around for me in a quite profound way. I really don't have anything I can bitch about. I'm in a very happy place, and just feel blessed to have all that I have.

I feel kinda selfish about it though, even though I'm not really doing anything selfish. I guess I feel selfish because I've accepted such charity from those I love. I kinda feel like I'm taking advantage of someone giving me everything they can for my benefit. I don't like looking at it like it's just for my benefit, I would rather think that it's for OUR benefit, and the benefit of our future and family. Of course I speak of Laura and her amazing generosity. But without her, I'd have so little. With her, I have everything I could ever ask for. I have a family, I have children, I have a loving environment to go home to. I have the support emotionally to follow my dreams. I have someone backing my play so I CAN follow my dreams. I would have NOTHING if she were not in my life today.

Literally. I believe I'd be homeless. I would have NOTHING.

Although I like to believe that the things I've received are for the benefit of the collective household, I would be lying if I didn't acknowledge that I do benefit. This makes me wonder why I deserve any of this, but I'm so happy now that I wouldn't trade it for anything.

Recently, I opened the studio. I wouldn't have the ability to have opened it at a new standalone location without her. The studio has been open for business since Monday, July 9th. I had my first booking on Wednesday, and have had one or more booking each day since then. Today, I just wrapped up a weekend with a killer band called Die Tryin. Tomorrow, I'll have a day off finally, but I still have things to do at my own leisure at the studio. So things have been booking up here. I'm booked most weekends through the beginning of August!

So I sit here and think about how long I've wanted to be able to take this plunge. I sit here in my control room after having taken the plunge, and I'm extremely proud to be where I am. It's the most wonderful feeling! But I can't take stock of what I have without thinking about why I have it.

Laura. You've given me everything. I will spend my life praising you. Thank you for everything you've given me. I love you from the bottom of my soul.

Thank you.