Friday, August 19, 2011

Feeling Human

To err is human. To feel human is to feel the consequences of your err. In that case, I feel very human right now. But in a way, it makes me happy to know that I can feel this human, even though it doesn't feel good.

I'm not going to go into specifics, in fact this will remain intentionally vague. But long story short, I did something stupid and it hurt someone I care about as a friend. It made them feel pressured, and unimportant. I'm not ok with acting so stupid, and I'm not ok with having made a friend feel this. I'm trying to improve myself, so in some ways, it's good to know that I have that part of me to work on, but I still feel like a major dick.

So to the person I'm referencing, please know that I've had nothing but massive amounts of love and respect for you from the beginning. I know you've said you've forgiven, and not to worry about it, but the human side of me won't let me. And I'm glad that I can feel this human, it helps reaffirm to me that I am human.

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