More being numb.

I've been a total asshole to people on Facebook all day, and I know that I'm not normally like that. I hope I haven't made any enemies. I've been on the verge of a lot of anger about life in general, but mostly about Olive's passing.

Last night was rough cause I couldn't sleep. Tonight's shaping up the same way, cause it's 3:15am and I'm blogging.

I got some new information about how Olive died though, and although it came at a bad time (while I was pushing a homework deadline, which killed my ability to concentrate on the assignment), it was good to know for my own closure. It helped me understand what happened.

Apparently Sarah moved onto a very busy corner in Clintonville, and doesn't have a fenced in yard. One of her room mates let Olive out unattended, and olive wondered into the road. She was struck in the head, by a blue car according to the blue flecks in her ear, wandered back into the yard, and died.

I'm angry that the son of a bitch that hit her didn't stop to check on her well being. I'm angry that Olive was allowed out of the house unsupervised. I'm angry that my little girl is gone. I realized today that the last time Olive was at my house was in July, and that I only saw her once or twice after that, and that also makes me angry. But I'm at this point more sad than angry. I can only be angry for so long. Olive's gone, it's time to let go.

Now I'm sad, but my day of non-functioning due to immense pain (physical and emotional) is coming to an end. Life has to continue tomorrow. I'll miss her.

I love you Olive.