Peace of mind…….sort of.

I got my tax return this morning, which means that while I wait for unemployment to kick in I can pay my bills. This gives me peace of mind, as while I was waiting for the IRS to process it (The IRS delayed refunds for those who filed early. I filed before January 26th, and Laura filed after Jan. 26th. Laura got hers several days before I got mine. That's what I get for filing early?), I was getting nervous watching my available cash deplete slowly.

But then again, it also makes me somewhat upset. This money was supposed to be used to expand my studio and pay for a vacation. I planned to buy new acoustic treatment, possibly a new audio interface, and then I planned to go to Colorado with Laura in June. Now after losing my job, that money is needed to live on, and while I'm glad I have it, I'm also pissed off somewhat that life threw this curveball at me.

It's not all bad. My stress level is way down from it's previous point a week ago. It seems like a month ago since I last worked, but it was only a week. I've had time to relax, take things slow, and sit on this money while searching for an ideal employment situation. I've had a few leads, as discussed, so fingers crossed.

But I still get upset thinking about it somewhat. I'm 31, vowing that I won't be broke when I'm 35, and I've been cut down from making $29,000.00-year to making $0. How the hell am I supposed to make this work?

It'll take some careful planning, but I do plan to make it work. I'll find another job before the money runs dry, use Ohio's safety nets if I have too, re-focus on my education goals, and dig out of this mess. Meanwhile, the wishful thinker in me wonders if I can bring in enough studio business to sustain myself now that I have some downtime to market it. That would be nice, but I'm not hedging my bets.

So yeah, I'm angry, but I'm thankful. The job loss is a double edged sword, both a curse and a blessing. I'll be ok with some really careful planning, and I will not re-adjust my goals for anyone or anything. I still have 2017 in my sights, and I'm still going to fight to achieve my 5 year goal.